By Beth Barhydt
On the last Thursday of August, more than 500 people gathered at 6 South Avenue for the town’s 8th Annual Community Addiction Awareness Vigil. They were there for many reasons—to grieve, to remember, to support, and, most of all, to be a part of a collective struggle against addiction. As the golden hour bathed the scene in light, the one hundred chairs filled up quickly, and those who couldn’t find a seat stood. In the end over 500 people came together, a testimony to how widespread the impact of addiction is.
The event, organized by the New Canaan Parent Support Group (NCPSG), was about family, survival, and the power of shared stories. Paul Reinhardt, founder of the NCPSG, opened the event. “Family support is a critical lifeline during a loved one’s struggle with addiction,” he said. “Inspiration caused by a hopeful story can lead to the magical moment where a loved one engages in sustainable recovery.”
Reinhardt’s words hit home for many in the audience, people who have walked the same path, or know someone who has. They had come to hear stories of recovery, yes—but also to confront the reality of loss. The Resource Wall and the Hope & Remembrance Wall were stark reminders of lives lost to addiction, their photos and names a call for continued vigilance.
Aidan, a local New Canaan resident, took the microphone and told his story of addiction and recovery. Born and raised in New Canaan by a single mother, Aidan struggled with anxiety and depression from a young age. By the time he was 15, his life had begun to unravel. “I tried cannabis for the first time with my cousin,” he shared. “That’s pretty much the moment when my mind became controlled by substances.”
Aidan’s story mirrored that of so many others, starting with recreational use and ending in a nightmare of dependence. By the age of 17, he had overdosed after mixing alcohol, sedatives, and stimulants. “I would do mental gymnastics to convince myself it was normal to use all day,” he said. “I lost any sense of morality. I had no concept of moderation. I was completely out of control.”
But Aidan’s story didn’t end in tragedy. Through the support of his family, and the people he met in 12-step programs, Aidan found his way to sobriety. On October 8, 2018, he entered recovery. Since then, he’s attended meetings every day and given back to others by speaking at hospitals and rehab centers. “The opposite of addiction is connection,” Aidan said. “And I am connected to those who struggle.”
He wasn’t the only one to speak that night. Ben Tuff, an ultra-swimmer and documentarian, also shared his journey to recovery. His connection to New Canaan was personal—his sobriety began at Silver Hill Hospital. In an interview he told the Sentinel, “Every morning at a church in New Canaan, I’d attend the AA meeting. Those were my people,” Tuff said. “For five weeks, that’s what started everything.”
Tuff’s message, like Aidan’s, was one of perseverance, and of the vital role that community plays in the journey to recovery. His film, Swim Tuff: How I Swam Myself Out of the Bottle, chronicles his sobriety, paralleled by his 24-mile swim from Providence to Jamestown. “It wasn’t easy,” Tuff said, speaking of both his swim and his recovery. “But it’s all about who surrounds you and the family that surrounds you.”
The idea of family being central to recovery resonated throughout the night. John Hamilton, President and CEO of Liberation Programs, who served as the event’s emcee, underscored that theme. “Stigma surrounding addiction prevents many from seeking help,” he said, reminding the audience of the painful reality that only 10% of those who need substance use treatment receive it. “The Vigil combats this stigma and empowers families to be part of the solution.”
Another emotional moment came when Cini Shaw, another speaker in recovery, shared her deeply personal story. “I was born and raised in Peter Cooper Village on the Lower East Side of Manhattan,” she said. Shaw’s life, like so many, was shaped by alcoholism before she ever took her first drink. “My parents divorced when I was four because of my father’s drinking. He abandoned us.” The cycle of addiction in her family continued. Shaw’s mother remarried three times, each husband plagued by alcoholism, and each time, Shaw was witness to the devastation it brought.
Determined to avoid her family’s fate, Shaw never imagined she would develop her own alcohol use disorder. But, as she told the audience, the seeds of addiction had been sown long before she ever picked up a drink. “I bought into the myth of the ‘mommy wine culture,’” she said. “It wasn’t random. Alcohol helped me sit with my discomfort, my fear, my sadness.” Eventually, her drinking spiraled, from wine to vodka, from social to solitary. “I was slowly killing myself,” she admitted. “I didn’t want to die, but I knew I didn’t want to live the way I felt.”
Shaw’s recovery began with detox and AA meetings. She built a new family—one of recovery. “I could learn how to self-soothe and how to cope without harming myself,” she said. “My recovery family is made up of women in AA, my Liberation family, and of course, my incredible Lighthouse family who have stood by me through some of the most difficult years of my life.” Shaw’s story was one of survival, but also one of unimaginable loss. In 2015, she lost her son, Gregory, to an opioid overdose. “He is honored on our remembrance wall,” Shaw said. Despite this, she continues to fight for recovery—not just for herself, but for the family she has found in the recovery community.
The candlelight ceremony, led by local clergy members Chapin Garner and Cheryl Bundy, was a poignant moment. As the flames flickered in the gentle breeze, families held their candles in silence, their faces illuminated in the growing twilight. It was a tribute to those lost and a symbol of hope for those still fighting.
Reinhardt’s vision for the event has always been about more than raising awareness. It’s about action, about showing people that recovery is possible—and that it’s often the stories we share that make the difference. “Every time someone steps forward to share their authentic experience of recovery, I believe a life is saved,” Reinhardt said.
For those in the audience who might have been struggling in silence, the stories shared that night were a lifeline. Eric Thumen, a longtime member of the NCPSG, summed up the Vigil’s impact the following morning. “It was beautiful, especially the candlelight vigil at the end. The weather was absolutely spectacular, and the music from Scott Troyer and friends set the perfect tone. It’s hard to describe, but you could feel the support.”
As communities continue to grapple with the challenges of addiction, events like the Vigil provide a vital reminder that no one is alone in their struggle.
After the Vigil, Reinhardt shared his gratitude. “It’s hard to believe, but we actually hit our stretch target of 500 people at our August 29th Vigil,” he said. “Our goal was to touch and inspire through the recovery testimonials, and we believe we succeeded with our recovery speaker lineup of Aidan, Cini, and Ben.”
Looking back on the 8th Annual Vigil, the message is clear: New Canaan is a community that stands together. The road to recovery is long, and here no one has to walk it alone.
