By The Rev. Dr. Scott Herr
The French call it la rentrée (the return), and it’s happening right now! While it surely isn’t as dramatic in New Canaan as in Paris, many of us are returning from summer vacation and travel and getting back into a new season of school and work routines. On behalf of all my clergy colleagues, I want to encourage you to consider how important participating in some kind of community is for your well-being, the health of your family and our larger society.
Have you noticed how the importance of community is trending among social commentators recently? I was fascinated to read a recent interview with Robert Putnam, the Harvard sociologist and author of Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community. Almost 25 years ago, he was lamenting how Americans were going to church less, joining clubs less, and losing trust in our fellow Americans and institutions. 25 years later, he observes that we have become more socially isolated, and that leads to bad things for individuals and society. He laments that morality is in decline, and confesses, “Now, suddenly, I’m no longer the social scientist, I’m a preacher. I’m trying to say, we’re not going to fix polarization, inequality, social isolation until, first of all, we start feeling we have an obligation to care for other people…”
Or have you been following the observations of Senator Chris Murphy? He warns about a “crisis” staring us in the face. “You can look at the statistics about suicide, depression, overdoses and declining life expectancy. You can point to the fact that roughly 70 percent of wild animals on Earth have disappeared since 1970 or examine the astonishingly pervasive sense of loneliness that now seems to color so many American lives. But no statistics really capture the feeling, shared by growing numbers of Americans, that the world is just getting worse.”
Or did you see David French’s article last Sunday, “The Loneliness Epidemic Has a Cure”? He asserts “the story of modern America… is a story of declining connections, declining friendships and a loss of a sense of belonging. That sense of isolation makes people miserable, and as the misery spreads, it affects our economy and our culture. The data,” he writes, “is horrifying.”
The American Enterprise Institute released its 2024 Social Capital Survey and the results expose a stark social divide. But perhaps more concerning is the fact despite the increasing economic divisions in our country, “Americans of all stripes are reporting that they have declining numbers of friends.” 24% of high school graduates report having zero close friends. That’s one in four teenagers saying they have zero close friends, and that’s heart-breaking!
As a nation, we are facing serious spiritual and moral crises more than we realize, and part of the solution, part of the cure, part of the healing requires community. Frederick Buechner, once wrote, “You can survive on your own. You can grow strong on your own. You can even prevail on your own. But you cannot become human on your own!”
As depressing as the social commentary may sound, there is hope! Connecting can happen in an infinite variety of ways. While on vacation this summer, I enjoyed pickle-ball with my wife and other family members. I’m not saying pickle ball is anywhere near as transforming as corporate worship, but regularly spending time with others can lead to friendships and a social network that can be meaningful.
Any of our religious communities in New Canaan would love to welcome you. And if you are not already a member of a religious community, join some of our services of worship. This Sunday, September 8th, FPCNC is hosting our Rally Day worship and picnic. We’ll be having a meaningful time at our 10:30 worship service, and then a fun time after the service (rain or shine!) with a live band, bouncy house, sketch artist, other games and plenty of food. There’ll even be a pie throwing opportunity to raise money for the New Covenant House in Stamford!
Or, perhaps you prefer some time in nature? Come join the Bristow Bird Sanctuary Centennial Celebration this Sunday as well. The program starts at 2:00 p.m. Or, if you prefer more intellectual stimulation, I invite you to consider some lectures for the whole town being given by Professor Andy Root later this month (September 21-22). Or there will be some amazing concerts starting again later in the Fall with New Canaan Chamber Music. Or, consider the weekly meetings of the Rotary Club (Lobsterfest is coming up the end of the month!) or the Exchange Club. There are many excellent opportunities for connecting and serving in meaningful ways in New Canaan.
Indeed, la rentrée is upon us, but getting back into healthy routines for you and your family doesn’t just happen… I encourage you to explore the many big opportunities in our small town for you to get involved, become more human, make new friends and discover again that community matters!
The Rev. Dr. Scott Herr is one of the pastoral team for the First Presbyterian Church of New Canaan. Scott is married to Kim Harrison Herr and they are thankful for their four adult children.
