Local Mom Starts New Network for “Twice-Exceptional” Families

By Annali Hayward

If special education is for those with learning differences, and gifted programs are for those with high ability, what exists for those with both?

That’s just one of the questions pondered by New Canaan’s newest network, whose members find themselves parenting one of the country’s estimated three million “twice-exceptional” children.

Twice-exceptionality (2e) is the term used by many neuropsychologists to refer to individuals who are gifted, with a co-occuring learning difference or other challenge, such as ADHD, autism, dyslexia or sensory processing disorder (SPD).

Though the profile is becoming more widely recognized, it is easily misunderstood and misdiagnosed, particularly at first, when an individual’s intelligence “masks” their difficulties, often leading to kids falling through the cracks of the system.

It’s a frustrating path Yush Sztalkoper, 42, knows all too well.

Sztalkoper, who was born in China but raised in Danville, Va., first noticed her child’s unique challenges at four years old. It was April 2021 and the family had recently moved to New Canaan from California.

“We had two years of navigating unknowns,” said Sztalkoper recently. “It was a scary and confusing time.”

It was not until 2023 that their situation finally became clear: their child was 2e. For Sztalkoper, the path forward became clear.

“I founded the Twice-Exceptional Network (TEN) because I want to help others avoid the same challenges,” she said. “Parents frequently struggle to find adequate resources and often feel lost navigating this uncertain path. They need a roadmap to navigate this journey, avoiding the trial and error and endless searching for the right experts that many of us have faced.”

It didn’t take long for Sztalkoper to realize she wanted to dedicate herself entirely to this endeavor: she quit her corporate job in March and has quickly built a program to address the needs of the community.

The “spiky” profile of a 2e child often sees them completing advanced schoolwork, whilst struggling with seemingly simpler tasks, such as brushing teeth. It can be extremely frustrating for parents.

“Many 2e children have incredible potential to be future change-makers, and I want to help unlock that potential, and ensure they receive the support they need to thrive,” she said.

TEN held its inaugural event at New Canaan Library in May, and at last week’s follow up, a panel of experts were on hand to speak with parents about their unique position and challenges.

Sztalkoper invited two neuropsychologists, Dr. Rebecca Fontanetta and Dr. Carolyn Certilman, as well as local occupational therapist, Amanda Zecchin, to provide insight and support. “I invited these experts because their progressive and integrative mindsets are essential for supporting the unique needs of 2e children,” she said.

Zecchin said she has worked with countless 2e children.

“I have seen first hand how [early] identification of their unique strengths and challenges helps parents understand the more challenging behaviors,” she said. Without that, significant stress can negatively impact the entire family as well as the child’s self esteem.

“[Education] creates positive outcomes that benefit child, the family and our entire community,” Zecchin added.

This is key to Sztalkoper’s approach. She aims to support parents because “they are the frontline caretakers, and equipping them with the necessary skills can significantly impact their children’s success.”

But Sztalkoper also appreciates the vital role schools play in helping the 2e child — a topic many parents at last week’s session felt strongly about.

Indeed the network’s next session (at the New Canaan Library on July 18th) will focus Special Education advocacy, to help parents navigate the school system and get the right support for their child.

Although TEN is still in its early stages, Sztalkoper has big plans.

“We plan to expand our resources, offer more expert-led workshops, and create opportunities for parents to connect, share experiences, and learn from each other,” she said.

But first and foremost, she’s listening.

“This is a community built by and for those who need it most,” she said.

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